a few weekends ago i was invited to my first full moon ceremony. i had zero idea what to expect and, very true to lent-laura, jumped out of my comfort zone and headed to the party on my own to meet up with a bunch of strangers.
i looked at it this way: be open to new experiences, what’s the worst that could happen, and if nothing else, it was a friday night with a bonfire. i didn’t have to view it as anything else.
i was one of the first to arrive – thanks dad for teaching me to be punctual – and helped build the fire as i introduced myself to the other attendees. they were familiar with the whole ordeal, it seemed that i was the only newbie.
we all settled into our lawn chairs around the fire pit as the sun began to set. Alison, our host, smudged each of us with sage to cleanse us, and to remove negative energy from a space. she then lead us through a short heart opening meditation while she played her crystal singing bowls. energy is a really funny thing that not everyone feels; i’m affected by it – still not sure if that’s a gift or not. it was a really overwhelming sensation to be around the fire with like-minded souls, all open to new beginnings.
we opened our eyes and were instructed to free write for a few minutes about what we felt was holding us back, where we were stuck and what we wanted to let go of. then we were to write about what we wanted, what we were hopeful for, where our desires led us.
i put hot pink pen (naturally) to paper, and scribbled out what looked like a love letter to myself. i guess it actually was.
then came the hard part: sharing. it wasn’t mandatory but it was encouraged. we went around the circle and one-by-one we read what we wrote, or a general overview of it.
i was giving up doubt, self-limiting belief and horribly negative self talk. i was giving up hating myself. i’ve spent so much of my 30 years convincing myself and whomever else will listen just how useless i was. like i didn’t deserve to occupy space or their time.
i was opening myself up to possibility, to all types of love, most importantly self-love. i was allowing myself to see the positives and gifts in my nature and my ability. i was breaking down walls and letting people in. i was allowing myself to be vulnerable.
i folded my piece of paper and tossed it into the fire. the flames erupted in a symbolic, fiery surge. and my heart smiled. the attention-seeker in me was thrilled that it was the brightest, largest burn of the bunch….then i though i should have given up comparisons.
perhaps the next ceremony.
and that was that. i rewarded myself with a cookie and walked myself home under the glow of the big, bright moon.
i’ve felt a funny shift in the universe since then. nothing dramatic, but the opportunity for me to test my declarations. tests are fun when they include making out with cute boys. less so if they involve math.
have you ever taken part in a full moon ceremony?